In the Suburbs: Patches really gets into Westminster

No one in our part-human, part-canine family misses Westminster, the annual premiere dog show, which was broadcast from Madison Square Garden earlier this week. And our youngest, four-legged, Jack Russell sibling, Patches, really gets into this show and the commercials, which have all been "canine-ized."

Trust me, if you think this dog is oblivious to what is going on, I invite you to come for a visit and watch him in action. Sometimes he observes from his two-pillow perch on our den sofa. Other times he gets up-close and personal. And he also likes to just lie on the rug, taking in the big picture.

Sadie, our other Jack, has always ignored the events at the show and she prefers to sleep through all the competitions. Her loss, of course. But at least she keeps us company.

Westminster is the event of the winter and there are more breeds from more parts of the world than I can count. For us, the competition is something not to be missed.

I am absolutely awed by the amount of money that is spent preparing these dogs for competition and the number of handlers who are not owners. There was a huge article about Westminster in the business section of The New York Times, emphasizing the dollars that owners put into grooming their dogs to be Best in Show, which I believe is a $50,000 prize.

For instance, in one clip, Uno, the beagle who a couple years ago won Best in Show, the top dog in the world of canines, was strutting his stuff around Manhattan just after the competition. Uno received a standing ovation at Westminster for his victory, made appearances on all the morning talk shows, dined on a steak at Sardi's and was in a myriad of other guest spots, including foot ball games.

The head of the Westminster Kennel Club made a point of telling viewers that the very next morning after a dog is named best in show, the phones start ringing off the hook with requests for information about the breed and breeders. This show packs a real wallop in the canine world.

Patches, of course, knows none of these details. He usually watches quietly while the judges examine the smaller dogs on the exhibition stand, but his eye is clearly on movement. As soon as the trainers start to run around the rink with the dogs, Patches storms the screen, hoping that the four-legged candidates will respond to his gesture. But, alas, the dogs keep running and Patches keeps storming until he tires himself out.

In some cases, we know he is paying closer attention than one might think he is. That level of attention often depends on the size and the color of the dog that Patches is following. He seemed to take a shine to a Whippet, who won best of breed, a Puili, which was a sweet-looking dog with "dread locks"; a delightful looking French Bulldog whose name I didn't catch; and a rough-coat collie.

In each case, when the announcers confirmed winners, the "Patch", as we call him, stood in front of the screen, head cocked with wonder, wondering what was happening in the ring. Then he gave the screen a quick butt with his head and returned to his sofa perch.

I wonder if, in doggie thoughts, our little guy is fantasizing about being right out there with other terriers. After all, he must recognize some similarity. I noticed he was particularly interested in the Fox Terrier, who competed the first night. And he seemed to take a shine to the bulldog, who placed but didn't win. The French Bulldog won that competition.

He also seemed mesmerized by a ridiculous commercial promoting doggie dentures. Four dogs broke into toothy smiles, while a fifth mentioned that the whole denture thing was silly and set about chewing denture sticks. Patches stormed the first dog, who looked like a canine Cheshire cat.

When we returned to the broadcast, the Patch turned to me, a look of serenity on his face, and I noticed that his mouth seemed to be curled up in a little smile. Then another competition began and he was up close and personal all over again with the screen.

I was trying to explain what happens with our dog to a friend of mine who owns Greyhounds, but she started laughing before I could finish. By the time I was ready to resume, she told me that her dogs pay no attention to Westminster and are more content to just sleep.

Sadly, I had to complete this essay before the competition for Best in Show at Westminster. But I'm sure the results will be posted on line later in the week. During the second night, the Patch resumed his perch on the couch and continued storming and licking the screen.

But I know he was still into Westminster and was just checking out his favorite candidates. It's so great to have a dog that likes the same things we do. There's no arguing, no fighting for the remote. It's just peace and quiet.

Steven Gaynes can be reached at steven.gaynes@yahoo.com.