On the Market / Comedian Lisa Lampanelli selling Fairfield beachside home
FAIRFIELD — Former standup comic Lisa Lampanelli has experienced turbulence and tranquility in her life and career, going from her moniker as the “Queen of Mean” for her insult comedy to the more recent “Queen of Meaning,” as reported in a March 18, 2019, Connecticut Post article.
Those extremes mirror the beachside surroundings in which she lives; at one time waves gently lapping the shore, and at another time angry seas and wind stirring the coastline.
She isn’t intimidated by Mother Nature’s changing temperament any more than she is of a heckler in an audience. In fact, only months before Superstorm Sandy struck the region, Lampanelli purchased her contemporary colonial house at 1053 Fairfield Beach Road, one of the few houses spared by the storm’s wrath.
Although Lampanelli has enjoyed living and entertaining family and friends in this nine-room house, the Trumbull native is looking for new digs to match her new short haircut — partly buzzed and blue — her new body image — she’s recently dropped a significant amount of weight — and her new path — she retired from standup comedy last year to become a storyteller and life coach.
Lampanelli said she chose this shoreline haven because of its proximity to New York and Long Island Sound.
“I love the Cape, but I didn’t want to drive there from the city every weekend. I can feel like I’m on vacation every day. This is my sanctuary. It’s my respite,” she said.
As many residents of this waterfront community do, Lampanelli has named this house. No cutesy FantaSea, Heart’s Desire, or Shore Thing would do. Lampanelli named her house for the television character Tony Soprano’s boat, and we’ll leave it at that.
The tall, skinny house, which was featured on HGTV’s “Celebrity Holiday Homes,” was built in 2002 and features 3,897 square feet of living space on three finished floors.
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“When you walk onto the third floor all you can see is sea and sky. I’m selling because I’m too lazy to walk upstairs,” Lampanelli said, joking.
Actually, this house features major motivation to climb the stairs. It has a unique, helix-inspired spiral staircase that was crafted specifically for this house. It looks like a sculptural work of art, and if the water and shoreline weren’t constantly stealing focus this would be the focal point of the living space.
Outside, Mother Nature provides the natural artwork as seen from the many windows of this house. And yet, Lampanelli said, it was masterfully designed with windows positioned in such a way that ample light floods each floor while she also enjoys a wealth of privacy, even with neighboring houses so close.
“If you’re going to live in a beach community you deal with close-by neighbors. That’s what you buy in for but he (the architect) made the house so you don’t feel infringed upon,” Lampanelli said.
ABOUT THIS HOUSE
TYPE: Contemporary Colonial
ADDRESS: 1053 Fairfield Beach Road
NUMBER OF ROOMS: 9
FEATURES: direct waterfront property on Long Island Sound, walk to the water, private beach, 0.12-acre level property, deck, balconies, exterior lighting, helix-inspired staircase, security system, minimal maintenance lawn and gardens, Thermopane windows, one fireplace, central air conditioning, new zoned natural gas heating system, rear staircase, attached under house one-car garage, ample off-street parking, ample closets and storage space, partially finished attic, unfinished basement crawl space, room for an elevator, four bedrooms, three full and one half baths
SCHOOLS: Mill Hill Elementary, Roger Sherman Middle, Fairfield Ludlowe High
TAX RATE: 26.36 mills
It was cleverly designed to have angled French doors to the large deck instead of facing the water straight on, thereby redirecting wind off the water and limiting potential storm damage. The house has an open airy feel and a flexible floor plan that allows for versatile use of rooms.
Some bedrooms could serve as an office, art studio, yoga room, or game room. The only room that should not be repurposed is the master suite. That is some view to wake up to every morning.
The room features a wall of floor-to-ceiling windows that open, accordion-style, to a private balcony/deck looking over the Sound. Another bedroom — currently the meditation room “that I do no meditating in” — has a Juliet-style balcony.
The house has plenty of space for everyone, including a private wing that is ideal as an in-law, au pair or guest suite.
It’s a good house to be alone in and a good house for entertaining, Lampanelli said, adding “This is a host’s house, for sure.”
The kitchen was designed for function but also for entertainment and with the setting in mind. The large center island topped with granite provides ample room for the cook while encouraging people to congregate. A floating cabinet was installed so as not to obstruct the water views.
Lampanelli said the next owners can set up chairs on the beach or the deck to get a front-row seat for Fairfield’s Fourth of July fireworks. The gravel driveway can accommodate as many as 12 vehicles for family gatherings and special events or just a day at the beach, or game night. And it is a great gathering place.
“It’s impossible to be in a bad mood in this house. You just can’t. ... There’s a light to this house. There is a real spirit here. When you look outside, you say ‘How can I be in a bad mood,’ even on a rainy day,” Lampanelli said.
There will be an open house on April 7, from 1 to 3 p.m.
For more information or to set up an appointment to see the house, contact Helen Cusa or Kecia Von der Ahe of Halstead Real Estate; Cusa at 203-451-7731 or email@example.com, and Von der Ahe at 818-590-7374 or firstname.lastname@example.org.